Tears of an Angel
by TheEpicness239
Summary: One-shot "Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal."


"_Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal."_

* * *

She kept fumbling with the buttons on her jacket. She had no idea why she was doing this, she was sure that people around her thought she was crazy.

_Cover my eyes  
__Cover my ears_

Maybe it was because she couldn't think about anything in that moment.

Maybe it was because if she focused all of her attention on a small piece plastic, then perhaps the pain that threatened to crush her from the inside out would give her weary body a rest.

But nothing could stop the indescribable agony that burned through her each time her heart pumped her blood throughout her body.

_Tell me these words are a lie  
__It can't be true_

With every beat her heart took, it was a excruciating reminder that her son's heart would stop.

_That I'm losing you  
__The sun cannot fall from the sky_

Her friends and family had no idea what to say to her. They had never been in this unimaginable situation.

Whenever her brother wasn't checking on her son, he tried to console her with soothing words, but even he wasn't strong enough to hold himself together.

She knew that Patrick and Robin were doing the best they could, and she didn't trust any other doctors in the world to treat her near dead son.

When she had first sat down in the waiting room, frantically trying to take her mind off of the horrific state she was in, she had tried to call her son's adoptive father.

_Can you hear heaven cry  
__The tears of an angel_

Out of the three hundred sixty-five days in the year, his wedding night was on this sickening night.

She left about ten voicemails, but she knew his attention was on anywhere but his phone, even if he was a police detective.

She had no idea what to do, she had hoped he would be here to help her through all of this, but he wasn't. She was on her own, something that she had gotten used to over the years.

Her focus had went from her phone to the buttons on her jacket, and here she was now, after sitting in a private room for over an hour, waiting to hear if her three year old son was still alive.

Steven would come in and out giving her updates, but it was never anything good. It was never the words she wanted to hear, like "He's stable now" or "He's going to be okay Liz."

Nothing good, only optimistic. Like "He's strong Liz" or "They're doing everything they can."

There was a glass of water on the table in front of her, but she couldn't bear to think of eating or drinking while her middle son's life was hanging on by a thread.

She tried to call Lucky again, but once again his voicemail answered the phone. She pleaded for him to call her, but she couldn't bear to tell him that it was her fault that their son could be dead.

Steven came in once again, and for a moment she allowed herself to be hopeful, but the look in his eyes was anything but.

"He made it out of surgery, but they're having a hard time stabilizing him," her brother whispered, his voice faltering with each word. He sat down beside her, and placed a shaking hand on her shoulder.

She didn't move her hand to cover his own. She didn't look in his eyes, to see if there was any comfort. She didn't move into his uneasy embrace.

She did nothing, but fumble with the damn plastic buttons on her jacket.

After a few minutes, Steven left the room and she was alone for the umpteenth time that night.

She left another message on Lucky's voicemail, and with each one, she could barely get any words out.

Two more hours passed, but still there was no word on the condition of Jacob Webber.

She left the private room to go to the bathroom, and with each step, her heart ached for her child.

Each step was a reminder that he may never walk again. As she passed by the nurse's station, she saw Lulu and Dante sitting in the chairs, along with Olivia and Steven in the corner. Nikolas was leaning against the counter, but he made no move towards her.

She said nothing as she walked by, and respectfully, they said nothing back.

Opening the bathroom door, she walks past the mirrors and towards a stall, but stop once she sees her reflection in the mirror.

She can hardly recognize the woman looking back at her, and was disgusted with herself with what had happened.

_The tears of an angel  
__The tears of an angel  
__The tears of an angel_

She needed an escape, something that would help this unbearable and agonizing pain. She just wanted it to stop.

Running out of the bathroom, she faintly hears Steven call out for her, but she runs by them and into an open elevator. She hits the button for the roof and the doors close behind her.

She tried to take deep breaths on the ride up, but her lungs failed her. Every breath was painful.

_Stop every clock  
__The stars are in shock_

Finally, the doors opened and she walked down the short hallway that leads to the small portion of the roof.

She noted how cold it was, but her body is so numb that it doesn't affect her. She walks up to the ledge and looks out at the bustling city below. She watched as people idly walked by, their lives unaffected by her tragedy. They went about their life without a care in the world.

_The river won't run to the sea  
__I won't let you fly_

And she envied them more than anything.

She opened her mouth to scream, but her voice failed her. Her throat was scratchy from lack of water and her mouth was dry. Her shoulders slumped in defeat as the situation caught up to her and hit her all over again.

_I won't say goodbye  
__I won't let you slip away from me_

Tears flowed down her cheeks, as if they were pain leaving her body, but this was not true.

With every tear that slid down her cheek, another two followed. Her nose was runny, but she didn't pull out a tissue to wipe it.

She stood on top of that rooftop for an hour, but no one came up to check on her, as if they knew she needed this time alone.

As the last tear slid down her cheek, she realized that she could not cry anymore more. Attempting to take a deep breath, she turns around to walk back towards the elevator, only to see _him_ standing there.

_Can you hear heaven cry  
__The tears of an angel_

She had no idea how long he had been standing there. Perhaps for a minute, or perhaps he had been there the whole time, but it didn't matter.

He made no moves towards her, nor did she. They just stood there, watching as each emotion crossed the other's face.

_The tears of an angel_

A tear slid down his cheek, but he didn't wipe it away. He wasn't one to show his emotions, as he believed it was a sign of weakness, but in that moment, he was nothing but weak.

His breathing was ragged, and he felt like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. Even though other considered him young, he felt like he was on his deathbed, prepared to die.

Her gaze moved from his pain stricken eyes to the buttons on her jacket. He carefully watches her as she fumbles with the buttons, but her fingers fail her.

_The tears of an angel_

Each step he took towards her felt like he was walking through quicksand, but once he finally reached her, he gently moved her hands aside and buttoned her jacket for her.

His fingers lingered on her jacket as his gaze quickly found hers. Her eyes were red and puffy, and her lips were quivering. She was barely holding herself together, and he was the only one to understand the pain she was going through.

He was the only one that could feel that same hole growing bigger in their hearts with each passing moment.

He was the only one that could understand that every breath they took could be the last one their son exhaled.

After a minute, she tried to unbutton the buttons on her jacket, but his hands gently took hold of hers.

At first, she pushed them away, not wanting to feel any contact with him because God knew she didn't deserve it.

She didn't deserve anyone's sympathy or comfort.

But he didn't back down either. His hands move to her forearms, gently rubbing them, but again she pushed him away.

He finally wrapped his arms around her, and she beat her fists against his chest.

She didn't want this. She didn't want him to hold her while they both screamed and cried, but he did.

_The tears of an angel_

He held her as the rolls of searing and at the same time numbing pain rolled through them.

_So hold on  
__Be strong_

He held her as her sobs quieted down and she just laid her head against his chest.

He held her as his hot tears seared a trail down his cheeks and into her hair.

He held her as he listened to her labored breathing that matched his own.

Finally, she moved out of his embrace, and instantly he missed the pain and comfort that she provided.

She walked away from him, but he followed her anyway. They both got onto the elevator together, but stood on opposite sides.

She couldn't look at him, because she knew that she would see shame in the fiery blue orbs.

But what she didn't know is that there was no shame in his eyes, only pain and guilt for not being there for his son.

As the elevator opened, he allowed her to get out first. He watched her as she opened the door to her private room and closed it behind her.

He didn't follow her this time, but stood guard outside of it. He refused to look through the window behind him, because he knew that if he did, the pain that was throbbing in his head would flare up at the sight of the broken woman inside.

So instead he focused his attention on the wall opposite of him. He memorized every line and crack in the wall, as if his life depended on it. The hallway was unusually quiet, as if the hospital knew that the two grieving parents were there.

His ears picked up on her moaning sobs, and his will quickly broke. He opened the door, but stopped in the doorway.

He felt like his heart was in his throat. He couldn't breathe and every swallow was painful as he looked at the woman before him.

Her head was in her hands, and she was screaming in pain. He wanted to take that pain away from her; he didn't want to see her hurt.

So he walked over to where she was sitting, and eased into the chair next to her.

_Every day hope will grow  
__I'm here_

He waited a moment before he took one of her hands in his, and for the first time since he found her, he started to talk.

He had no idea what he was saying, his mouth was on autopilot. He talked for about an hour, and at one point he thought he was describing the engine of his motorcycle.

_Don't you fear  
__Little one_

But it did stop her sobs, and her tears had stopped flowing. But that didn't mean that the pain left her body. It was still there, and it would never leave.

_Don't let go  
__Don't let go_

He rubbed her back, trying anything to try and soothe the hurt mother. She held his hand tightly, and he let her crush his fingers if it helped her.

_Don't let go_

There was a knock on the door, and the parents looked up to see who it was. Steve walked in with a heavy heart, and closed the door behind him.

He felt her tense in his arms, but he didn't dare look down at her. He just squeezed the hand he was holding as he watched tears build up in Steven's eyes.

_Cover my eyes  
__Cover my ears_

Before the words stammered past Steven's lips, he knew. Steven didn't even have to say anything, and he knew.

And she knew as well, once she saw Steven's body language. If she thought what she felt before was pain, this was worse. Much, much worse.

There was no word for what she was feeling. There was no way to describe the gaping hole in her heart, which Jake had previously filled.

"He's…he's gone."

_Tell me these words are a lie..._

* * *

_**A/N: That was…incredibly hard to write. I cried two times, and almost gave up halfway through. I have no idea why I wrote this, but I was watching Jake's death scenes the other day, and wanted to do it a different way. This is a one shot, and I will not be continuing it. I'm not really sure why I wrote this but I did. I hope you guys enjoyed it, and didn't find it too depressing. Lyrics to 'Tears of an Angel' by RyanDan. It's the saddest song I've ever listened to, and it's the song I heard when I watched Jake's death s/l for the first time. Let me know what you thought in a review. Look for my next Liason fic, which will be slightly less depressing **_


End file.
